Situation: Oblivious
by S-Chrome
Summary: Ron figures out in a hurry that his best friend is not the only one who suffers from the effects of his... obliviousness. Completed.
1. The Last Straw

Ron-Fortunate Events: Situation Oblivious  
By S-Chrome

Disclaimer: Ron. Kim. M.C. Cork. Schooley-B. The creators. Bit players. Owned. Disney. 'Nuff said.

* * *

In a little town named Middleton, a storm was a-brewin' 

Not the type of storm that dumps fast moving rain, hailstones, and thunder loud enough to spook the cows, but a storm of frustration. A storm of confusion and downright anger was brewing. Like most storms it was churning quickly, and it was almost tattooed on the face of Kim Possible. Three times she tried to get intimately close to him which ultimately failed . Two times she tried to take the direct approach to the boy who she had unexpectedly fell for, and two times he had managed to blow it.

...This is the guy she fell for.

'I mean, how dense could he possibly be?', She thought to herself. It was almost unbelievable. Monique and even Bonnie tried to clue him in, yet and still, no luck.

'No wonder Tara & Yori gave up,' She thought derisively.

Kim had known that Ron didn't really understand girls that well, if at all. But enough was enough! When she was hinting who she had the hots for, she had locked lips with him in the hallway, wasn't that the absolute direct approach? And what did Ron say?

_"It's Brick Flagg isn't it?"_

The thought of that answer agitated the redhead so much that she pounded a clenched fist onto the breakfast table, and promptly snapped the poor defenseless table in half. Plates were shattered as they hit the floor, coffee cups and orange juice glasses broke on contact. The rest of the Possible family glanced in horror at the sudden destruction, followed by taking a frightened glance at the now embarrassed redhead.

"Kimmie, is there something wrong," Her mother asked, still in shock from the suddenness of what just happened seconds ago. With a quick "Nothing's Wrong. Byemom, Byedad, Later tweebs," Kim flew out of the house, leaving the four family members pretty much bewildered. That small outburst clearly illustrated that this crushing business was really getting to her.

As she walked alone on her way to Middleton High, a feeling of doubt crept over the teen hero. Maybe it wasn't meant to be. No one should be worth all this frustration. But then again, that feeling in the pit of the stomach doesn't come and go as it pleases. Neither does the sudden flushing of the skin, and all that... mushy stuff. As the conflicting views continued to volley back and forth in her mind, another view came in front and center; '_Take your mind off of him. Focus on something else_.'

That seemed to be a good idea.

No further than a half mile away, a young man was wracking his brain trying to find out what was wrong with his best friend. She hadn't talked much to him since that evening a couple of weeks ago. It was a strange sunset for sure, as Ron, who was waiting for Kim to reveal who she was crushing on, found himself locking lips with her instead. He still didn't know what to make of that. He figured that she was avoiding him because he might have got the wrong answer.

_"Now do you know who it is?"_

_"Uh-huh."_

In fact, he still had no idea who this guy was, and apparently Kim was getting upset because of it. The sidekick never wanted to see her upset because of what he did or didn't do.

The blond's disposition changed from the normally lively, to an uncharacteristically grim. He figured that there was only thing to do: Just ask the question himself. It was just a matter of getting to school.

He turned the key to his scooter, and began to hit the road.

Well... He hit the road, the scooter had died at the end of the driveway.

'Piece of junk.'

* * *

Ron was still disappointed to know that he was still being avoided. He didn't like where it was going. Heck, he didn't like where he was going. 

The cafeteria. Where the breakfast and lunch were awful, and the lunchladies were even worse. As he continued to dread, something caught his eye.

Kim was sitting there, a few meters away.

He began to amble toward her, only to stop. _What if he made the situation worse? What if she blew up on him? _The blond shook off these thoughts and continued his path.

Kim didn't want to avoid Ron the way she was, but there was little choice. Either she was going to stay mad at him from a distance, or totally blow up in his face. As she looked to her immediate left, however, blowing up may just occur.

"Uh... Hey, Kim.," Ron said, fidgeting all the while.

"Oh... Hey, Ron. I-I was just...," Kim trailed off. She raised out of her seat to get away from her crush. She exited the cafeteria and power walked along the hallway. With some luck, maybe 'Oblivious Boy' would get the point. But, as she reached her locker...

"K.P., " Ron exclaimed whilst panting. "What's the rush? Is there something wrong?"

"Well... Uh...," She tried to sustain a reply, but couldn't bring herself to tell the young man the truth.

"W-Was it something I said or did,"

No response.

"It was something I did, wasn't it?"

Again, no response.

"Was it that time I said that the black dress made you look a little chubby?"

Kim shook her head. That was extremely annoying, but not the reason.

"Was it the time I fell on top of you and let Drakken get away?"

"No.," Kim said, shaking her head. She remembered that more _fondly _than anything.

"How about the time I threw...,"

"No," Kim said, cutting him off. _Wait a minute, threw what? _"What are you even talking about," She asked with a raised eyebrow.

Oops.

"Uh, never mind that. Look, it-it's gotta be something, Kim! I mean, you've been like, avoiding me for almost a week and well, I... miss you, K.P.," Ron admitted, hanging his head.

Uh-Oh... Guilt Central.

"You just gotta tell me what's wrong, Kim.," The blond pleaded.

As the minutes ticked and ticked away, Ron tried to figure out an answer for his best friend's problem, only to be rebuffed time after time. As they walked together in the hallway for the first time in like, weeks, Ron continued grilling every thing from chocolate to sugar rush. Kim, on the another hand, was beginning to feel a _tad_ bit annoyed at all these silly questions. She hoped that maybe her sidekick would just give it up for now.

No such luck.

"Is it... Female pattern baldness?"

"No.," The redhead replied, rolling her eyes.

"Is it that I like A.B.C.'d Bubble Gum?"

"No, Ron.," _Uggghh. Too much information._

"Is it... _That time _of the month?" The blond asked shakily.

That did it.

It was the straw that broke the camel's back. It was the kindling that stoked the fire and brimstone. It was the floodgates opening. It was the lightning bolt that preceeded the storm. It was...

OK, Enough with the metaphors. With a full stop, the redhead let out a frustrated groan, and faced the blond.

"No. No. No!", Kim exclaimed. Ron shrank back at the tone of voice that was being used. With her fist clenched tightly at her side, the beautiful, and now deadly redhead began to unleash six months of frustration on her terrified sidekick.

"You just don't _get_ it, do you? I try to lay on your shoulder. I try to sing for you. I kiss you in the _freakin' _hallway three weeks ago, and you don't know what's wrong?" When the blond shrugged his shoulders in confusion, the teen heroine's ire (and blood pressure, for that matter), rose a tenfold.

"I can't believe you, Ron! I can't (sniff) believe you don't know what's wrong.," She said, her voice beginning to break. "If you had one _scintilla _of good sense, you would know what was wrong.," she chided. With that, she made an about-face and walked away from the shocked blond.

Yes, it was harsh, but this was getting torturous. Six months of crushing... and yearning... and whatnot. Her best friend's obliviousness was starting to actually hurt, and if he wasn't going to get the point, why bother?

'No wonder Tara & Yori gave up on him.,' Kim thought again, blinking back tears. She seriously did not want anyone to see her like this. As she went to pull the cafeteria door open, she found that a hand was pressing on the door, keeping it closed. The teen hero whirled around to see who was impeding her entrance.

It was Ron, with a very concerned look on his face.

_Maybe he did get the point! Maybe it was meant to be! Maybe friends can become lovers without incident! Maybe the Astros would beat the White Sox!_

"Kim... Uh... What's a scintilla?"

Maybe Not.

The redhead let out a weary, frustrated sigh before taking Ron's hand off the door.

"Leave me alone, Ron.," She said plainly as she retreated into the cafeteria.

Ron cursed himself. That wasn't the question he wanted to ask! And moreover, Kim was gone, possibly for good. He sincerely had no idea what was wrong. Maybe this was the great divide that was going to break up the best of friends. Maybe they just wasn't meant to be friends for life like he had previously thought. Maybe it was all over. **_Maybe Christy Carlson-Romano was the worst pop singer since like, ever._**

No. He couldn't let this be. Thirteen years of friendship in the tank? Just like that? Stoppable would hear nothing of it. With a revived sense of determination, he left the school. Sure, he would pay for this infraction in Summer School, which was like, four months away, but this was important. Very important. _Mas importante._ He wanted his best friend back and so help him, he was going to get her back. And he knew of only one person who could help him.

His psychiatrist.

Dr. Phil...

...Lis

* * *

End of Chapter One. 

What will happen to Ron? Who is Dr. Phillis? Is C.C. Romano the worst pop singer ever? Find out in Chapter 2! Same Oblivious Time, Same Oblivious Place. Same Oblivious Channel!

:p

S-Chrome


	2. Dr Phillis Cures All

Situation: Oblivious: Chapter, The Second  
By S-Chrome 

Disclaimer: No disclaimer. Because I control it all. Well... Not really.

* * *

"Hi, Dr. Phillis!" 

"Dr. Phillis, you've changed our lives!"

"Yo, Doc Phillis. You're the best p-sychiatrist in the world! _Seriously!_"

Anyone who might have been anyone knew who Doctor Barbara Phillis, or Dr. Phillis for short, was. She was one of the best, thorough, and gifted psychiatrists in the nation. If there was any problem to be solved in the world of psychiatry, it was counted on that this talented young woman would solve it.

Plus she had her own spankin' television show, which _automatically_ meant she was good.

The lovely thirtysomething woman exchanged grettings with her secretary as she unlocked the entrance of her office. She closed the door and took a look of her spacious office, than at her desk, followed by the swivel chair.

That's funny... She had left the chair facing the door. For some reason, it was now facing the large window. It couldn't possibly be an intruder, could it? The psychiatrist quickly became suspicious. Grabbing a handy weapon, which actually was a large teddy bear, no less, the dark-haired woman snuck up from behind amd gave the chair a quick whirl.

No one was in the chair. But before the relieved doctor could catch her breath, she felt a faint tap of her shoulder.

"Looking for me, doc?"

Before the surprised doc could turn around, she was met with a quick, hard thrust about the neck. The psychiatrist went down to the carpeted floor in a heap.

'Boy, that was easy.'

The attacker dragged the unconscious doctor into the closet. After doing that, a cellphone from the pocket of attacker rang.

The number was 372-5536.

Stealthy, isn't it?

"Is the job done?"

"No, Doctor D. The mission failed. I think it's time to go back to the drawing board!", The attacker said snidely.

"Ohhh, you're sarcasm completes me! Anyway, until I tell you different, you be a niiice little psychiatrist over there."

"What? There's gotta be more to this than..."

"Tata, Shego."

Click.

It was incredible the rouses that people would go through just to get some extra bucks.

Steal a top secret weapon? No problem. Battle teen heroes for what seemed to be like, every day? Fine. But this was certainly ridiculous. Pose as a world-reknowned psychiatrist? Why? To what end? Those questions began to swirtl around through the mind of a now disguised Shego. Whenever this mission was complete, the greed clad young woman was going to give Drew a piece of her...

(Ring)

"Dr. Phillis?" A voice cracked into the speakerphone. "One of your regulars are here."

Oh joy, a regular. In less than three minutes, some loser would mosey into the office and start yakking about his love problems... Or his money problems... Or his length problems...

"Send him in," The disguised henchwoman said, uttering a sigh.

Shego had passed the time by filing her nails. At least she would be bored into a premature death without Drakken ranting and raving about the next master plan. That, at least, counted for something. Just as she was about to close her eyes, the door opened and lookie at who it was.

The sidekick.

Things just got a lot better, or a lot worse.

The blond took a seat on the comfortable chair beside her and laid back, his hands resting upon his chest.

"Hi, Dr. Phillis," He said solemnly.

"Hello... Uh... Uh...," In fact, Shego forgot what the heck his name was.

"Uh, Ron. Ron Stoppable," The blond answered.

"Yes, Yes, Ron. What seems to be the problem today?" She asked, trying to be as professional as she possibly could.

"It's my best friend, Kim. She's been avoiding me lately, and I don't know what's wrong," The blond said with an air of sadness in his voice. This made the ears of the impostor perk up a bit. She honestly didn't care about the relationship between Little Miss Kimmie and... Ron. Though, she had her suspicions. But, if there was trouble in paradise... What's a little bit of divide and conquer, eh?

Eh?

"Really, Ron? Care to tell me what's happened in the past month or so?" Shego asked, with a forced look of concern.

"Sure, Doctor P. Well, it sorta began when..."

* * *

_(Flaaaaashback) - Because the sins of the past must always be remembered... and whatnot._

_"So..." Ron said with a grin appearing on his face. "What would you say if he was here right now?" He asked with that mischievous grin on his face._

_Kim returned the grin with one of her own. "It's not what I would say." She replied. "It's what I would do." She said, grinning even more._

_As daring as Ron could get, the blond took one step toward Kim, almost in her face. With that grin still on his face, he asked the ultimate question._

_"And what would that be?" Ron asked. Kim took a half-step toward him to answer._

_"Let me show you." Kim answered.

* * *

_

After Ron described this incident, the disguised henchwoman's face took a look of surprise. Her suspicions were right! I mean, why the _hell _else would Kimmie drag this buffoon with her everywhere she goes? As she continued her critical thinking, Ron continued.

* * *

_  
"K-K-K-Kim." He stammered. "I... I think I know who this guy is." He said, stumbling over his words._

_Kim's grin grew into a brilliant smile._

_"And who is it?" She asked playfully._

_Ron was never sure about a lot of things. But what he was going to say may have been the most sure thing he had ever came up with._

_"It's Brick Flagg, isn't it?" _

Ok... Maybe not.

* * *

"ARE YOU KIDDING ME?", The pale beauty exclaimed, nearly blowing her cover. When the buffoon gave her a confused look, she gathered that she made a sliiiight mistake. "Er, I mean, interesting choice of words, Ron. Has there been a history of things like this happening between yourself and Kimmie?" 

Ron raised an eyebrow.

"Er, Kimberly." She said, correcting the obvious gaffe.

"Well," Ron began, scratching the side of his head. "I guess so."

* * *

_Peanut Butter, Jelly Time... Er... I mean, Flashback time. _

"Look who's under the mistletoe," A cheerful Drakken teased as teen hero and faithful stooge... er, sidekick were caught underneath the holiday plant... or flower... or...

Ron honestly tried to explain what it really was. He really did! But before he even knew what happened, he felt a warm pair of lips brush against his cheek. Did Kim just kiss him? Did it just feel... good? Did it feel weird? Did someone take a picture of this for all of the internet to see? Did Drakken know something he didn't?

* * *

  
Shego had remembered that... Tender moment. 

"Hah... They couldn't paint the blush off of your face, sidekick," She said, cracking up.

Ron raised another eyebrow.

"Er... I mean, is there anything else?"

"Um... Yeah, there is."

* * *

_(Three flashbacks - One chapter. The writer is getting desperate.) _

"Uh, what I meant to say was, thanks, Ron," The redhead said warmly. For a change of pace, Ron actually was successful in bringing down Drakken & Shego's latest scheme. With unfamiliar modesty, the blond thought nothing of it.

"As you say, K.P. 'No big,'" He replied.

"No way, Ron. Very big. Especially after...," Kim tried to explain for him, but was cut in by her sidekick.

"Think nothing of it, K.P. Even if I was ticked at you for calling me chubby, and I told you that you were a clumsy, goofy-looking worm, I'd think you still save me from fire breathing mosquitoes who were about to..."

Ron was silenced by Kim, who just about tackle hugged him. The blond fell backwards, landing on the hardwood floor of the gymnasium, and Kim was right there with him. Strange thing was, Kim was still hugging him, despite the fact that she was awkwardly on top of him.

When she finally decided to break the embrace, the redhead began to stare in his eyes, her green eyes just about shining into his his.

"Ron Stoppable, you're the best," she said dreamily before briefly kissing his cheek. With a brush of her hand onto his cheek, and a quick "later," she leapt off of him and paced out of the gym. The blond was shellshocked. He was stunned.

In fact, what just happened?

* * *

End of Chapter 2  
And the end of three consecutive iflashbacks! 

What is the imposing imposter going to do with this declassified, classfied, confidential information? Why is Ron so dense? And will you continue to care? Find out in Chapter 3!

S-Chrome


	3. Double Jeopardy, No, Seriously

Situation: Oblivious: Chapter, The Third  
By S-Chrome 

Disclaimer: K.P. Lives! So now we get to see whether or not K/R was nothing more than a rush job.

Oh... And uh... Despite the fact the our redheaded champion (and the blond sidekick) carry on, they are still properties of Disney. And don't you forget it. BOW DOWN TO THE MOUSE! (Or the guys who actually respond to viewers pressure. Or Iger... or whatever...)

* * *

It really didn't take a shrink to figure out what was up with Kimmie, Shego concluded. She knew within minutes of this session that her rival had a crush on this goofball. But, she certainly didn't know that she had it _this _bad for him. It was kind of interesting, in a disgusting, disturbing and off-kilter sort of way. 

Plus, if there was some way she and Drakken could exploit this. So much the better.

"Is that all?" The deceptive doctor asked.

"Well... No," Ron answered slowly. "Kim and I went to Middleton Park a few weeks back. I was gonna find out the guy who she took a liking to. But, instead of telling me who it was, she kinda, you know, kissed me, and then we left the park. I still didn't know who this guy was."

Holy Mother of... This was getting ridiculous. Speaking of ridiculous...

"Wait a minute... Did you say exactly two weeks ago?" The phony psychiatrist asked.

"Yeah, Why?"

It was at this point, Shego herself, was havng a flashback. _Exactly two weeks ago._

_It was all set up and ready to go. A potent knockout gas developed by Drakken to take out a good amount of the population of a city. Middleton was the first place we were going to hit, along with Possible and her little sidekick. With the princess out of the way, we were going to be free to bring the world to it's knees. Except that Kimmie got the drop on us. It was kinda strange... Loverboy wasn't with her and she looked kinda angry. A foil of the plot, three hard kicks to the ribs, and a knee to the face later, I guessed right. _

Maybe **this **was why she was so ticked that night.

Maybe it wasn't a coincedece, but there was only one way to find out.

"What about three weeks ago?"

"Err...," Ron stammered, scratching his head. "Oh! Um, Kim invited me to go with her to see this play. I would've gone, but _Christy Carlson-Romano _was in it... and she was going to _sing,_"

"Bleccchhh!" Ron and the disguised Shego exclaimed in unison.

"She was pretty steamed about something that night, if I remember correctly," Ron said shrugging.

Another flashback crept from the recesses of Shego's memory.

_Three weeks ago: Drakken's greatest nefarious scheme, or so he thought. Before the plot could even get off the ground, however, Princess was there in our lair, and looking 'pretty steamed.' For reasons I'm not quite sure of, out of the clear blue, she kicked Doctor D in his... well... uh, ball bearings. I almost felt sorry for the guy, That is, until she began pummelling me into oblivion as well. I still have no idea why. Maybe it was Romano's singing. Maybe the acoustics were too high. Maybe the performance lacked harmony. Maybe it was... Waaaaait a second... _

The very idea struck the villainess cold, like one too many punches from the undisputed heavyweight champion. It was a great realization, a moment of clarity that took place in her mind.

Yep... On of _those _moments.

_'She's taking it out on us!"_ Shego thought bitterly. _'This moron doesn't even know what's going on and because of it..._ _**she's... taking... it... out... on... us**_!"

"So what do you think is wrong, doc?"

The feigned look of a curious psychiatrist was replaced by the now familiar murderous look of a now undisguised Shego. The blond's eyes went wide as sausages... er, saucers as the villainess quickly advanced on him. Before he has the ghost of a chance of escaping, he was grabbed by the collar of his turtleneck and pinned against the wall.

"I'll tell you what's wrong, _Stoppable. _That girl is in _freakin love with you, and you don't seem to be getting the picture!_" The incensed young woman growled. What didn't he get? Before he could open his mouth in response, a new question came about.

"Who are you talking about?"

_Who? _

_Who?_

_Who!_

**_Whooooo are you? Who, Who, Who, Who?_**

The assassin was flabbergasted to say the least. With her jade green eyes almost blazing, she drew at almost nose-to-nose with her rival's dumb, idiotic, and extremely oblivious sidekick.

"Who? I'll tell you who!" The beyond angry villainess yelled before long-tossing the young blond into the couch. Once again, Ron tried to clear an escape path, but with cat-like cunning and pretty damn good quickness, Shego found herself on top of her captor.

Which may have been good for her captor when you really come to think about it.

"Kim Possible, that's who! You mean to tell me that Princess has had the hots for you for months, and you didn't even _freakin'_ notice?"

"Uh... No?"

With a growl of the frustration her rival had come to know so well, the emerald green glow began to build up in the villainess' green gloves, which meant to Ron, that he was either in grave danger, or he was going to be cooked Stoppable in like, five seconds.

"Stoppable, you've got five seconds to explain yourself before I blast you into next Hanukkah!" She spat.

That wasn't nearly enough time for the young man to sort out his... feelings or thoughts. But he had to make the best of what time he had. Speaking from the heart was something that Ron rarely did, but at this desperate point in time, it was his only chance.

"Uh... um... Well. You see the thing is that... I... kinda... sorta... like Kim too."

Ron had hoped that this truthful excuse would appease the beautiful green monster that was merely inches away from him. Coincedentally, he had also hoped that he would be more popular around school. Then again, He had also hoped for world peace. And then again, he had hoped that Bonnie wouldn't be such a... biyotch. _He had also hoped that Jesse McCartney's career would finally go down in flames.  
_  
Oh, come on... Like you wouldn't hope for that...

After all, Hope Springs Eternal, Right?

Wrong!

* * *

"If he's going to be that dense, girl, then he is not worth your quality time," A gossip monger said to her red-haired friend. 

"I guess you're right, Mo. Besides, in the long run, I think Ron and I would be better off if we stayed friends," Kim agreed, trying to take the sting out and rationalize this lost cause. When Monique nodded in agreement, the teen heoine went back to unloading her locker when...

"Kim!" Wade, the housebound computer genius on the computer screen exclaimed.

"Whoa, Amp down, Wade. What's the sitch?" Kim asked calmly.

"It's kinda major, Kim. It's about R..."

"This had better not be about Ron," Kim cut in. "Wherever he is, and whatever he's doing, let him get himself out of it."

"But, Kim! Shego just left out of an unidentified office building with Drakken, and she had Ron!"

Monique gasped in shock. Kim, on the other hand...

"**_Noooooooooooooooooooooo!"_** The redhead wailed in anguish, much to the surprise of one gossip monger and computer genius.

"I-It's OK, Kim. I've got a GPS Chip on Ron, remember?"

"Keep me posted. I'm on my way. No one's gonna take my _**Ronnie-Ron** _away from me!" Kim said with the super-special mission determination in her voice.

With that, and not so much as a 'Thanks Wade for keeping a GPS Chip on my sidekick', Kim zipped out of school, leaving Monique and Wade to think about what just happened, as well as what was just said by rushing redhead...

"Ronnie-Ron?" They both asked incredulously in unison.

* * *

End of Chapter 3 

What the heck is Drakken & Shego going to do to poor Ronnie-Ron? Where the heck is Kim going? Why is the narrator so damn sarcastic? Does the writer have a personal vendetta against McCartney & C.C. Romano? Can you tell that S-Chrome is having more fun with this fic than necessary?

All these _important, stirring_ questions would be revealed in the final chapter of Situation Oblivious!

S-Chrome


	4. Oblivious No More, For The Most Part

Situation: Oblivious: Chapter, The Finale  
By S-Chrome 

Disclaimer: The legendary sundance Ron will be going out in a blaze of glory. However, before he does, he just want y'all to know that him and the other bit players are owned by Disney and the legendary B-School and M.C. Cork. Word life.

...And whatnot.

* * *

It was never a good thing when you had one supervillain ticked off at you for something other taking down their wicked schemes, but as for Ron Stoppable, he had **two **super baddies mad as hornets at him. And judging by the look of one blue-skinned mad scientist and his dangerous associate who was literally green with intense anger at this point, he was in for a bad, baaaad afternoon. 

Plus being held prisoner in a dank warehouse being questioned like some sort of criminal didn't bode well for him either.

"Buffoon!" The former Drew Lipsky bellowed. "How could you not know? I mean, I could see if you were deaf, or blind, or..."

"I'm telling you guys! I didn't know!" Ron said defensively. "I mean, it's not like you two would notice if someone liked you," he continued "Shego would probably beat the guy up..."

"Got that right," She replied almost proudly. "Unless he was rich."

"And you, Drakken. I bet you wouldn't know if the..."

"Silence!" The mad scientist commanded. "You little buffoon! You don't know the first thing about me!"

"I know all about love," He paused. "...and heartbreak." he said, shaking his head.

"Oh boy," Shego said, placing an open hand on her forehead.

Ron was a bit surprised to hear this. So with a quick "What happened", Drakken began his story.

"It was a warm spring afternoon when we met. She wasn't the best-looking, but I knew of her... Inner beauty."

"She was like, 250 pounds," Shego whispered to the captive Ron.

"It didn't begin so well for us... But we would soon warm up to each other. It was such a nice beginning. I charmed her. You know, wined her, dined her... At first I was just going to, how you say, hit it, then quit it."

"Hit it?" Shego asked incredulously.

"--And quit it?" The blond asked in the same tone.

Drakken ignored the dubious questions and continued.

"At first I was only attracted to her potential to create super-destructive genetically mutated creatures," Drakken continues, as if there was no one in the warehouse with him.

"I thought I had what I wanted... Until Kim Possible and that brainy friend of her's came along. Her creation... no... _our_ creation went out of control. Before I know what happened I saw this large chunk of debris, coming right at me, and then... There she was... Like an angel from heaven, she delivered me from destruction and risked life and limb just to rescue me," The doctor said, wiping a lone tear from his eye.

Both villainess and sidekick watched as the doctor continued this monologue that was buried deep within the confines of Drew Lipsky's soul.

"After Kim Possible ruined everything, as usual... I pulled her aside, and... professed my love for her... I-I-I thought she would take my hand... but... She... She... said that there was..." at this point, the doctor who was ever so defiant when it came to just about anything, was now breaking down. "She said there was..." Now his breaking down turned into loud, gasping sobs. "...She said there was someone else."

"DNAmy... _My Amy_... Had fallen in love with a **MONKEY MAN**!" He yelled, sinking to his knees in defeat.

The blue-skinned, and now obviously heartbroken man began to sob uncontrollably at this tale of is lost love. Ron looked at him in something that resembled amazement. Shego, on the other hand, she had to cover her mouth to keep herself from an all out laugh riot.

* * *

The location was finally locked in, and Kim Possible was perched on the roof, searching for a more stealthy way to get in there. Stealth or not, she was more than ready to bust in there and snap some necks, or break some bones, or split some wigs. 

All for her _Ronnie-Ron. _

Only thing was she didn't know what the heck was going on. She looked through the fiberglass roof, no sign of Ron. All she saw was Drakken, who was curled up in the fetal position for some reason, and Shego, who was laughing away, and some of the doctor's henchmen, but no sign of Ron.

The fiends! They were probably holding him prisoner, doing who-know's what to him!

* * *

As Drakken continued to have his good little cry, Ron decided it was time to speak up. 

"What does that have to do with me?" What do you want me to do about this? What are you trying to say?"

Shego couldn't take much more of this. With a quick leap into the young man's face, she was going to..._ very politely _answer his question.

"It means..," But she was cut off by the doctor, who rushed to his prisoner's side. He grabbed his hand and looked at Stoppable directly in the eye.

"It means, Ron Stoppable, that if there is a lady out there who can actually stand you for thirty seconds and actually wants to be with you, then damnit, Ronald, you grab hold of her for DEAR LIFE and never let go. Don't be like me, a forty-something year old ad scientist who's still looking for the..."

The doctor's words of... encouragement were halted by Shego, as she grabbed the despicable doctor by the collar and threw him aside. The villainess voice was even more threatening this time.

"It means, _Loverboy_, that if you don't tell that lovesick girl how you feel about her, Kimmie is going to keep going after us!"

"Plus," A henchman added, his left arm in a sling. "We can't keep paying these outrageous hospital bills!"

"Plus," Added an unknown voice. "We have a little insurace policy that will make positively sure that YOU PROFESS YOUR LOVE!" the voice finished in a loud and annoyed tone.

Ron whirled around to see who that voice was. Short. Compact. Helmet. _Very, VERY Lo_ud.

"Professor Dementor?" The blond asked .

"Yes, young man," The more notorious professor answered. "I, too, have been a victim of your obliviousness." With that, he removed his helmet to reveal a large shiner beneath his right eye. Ron winced.

"Look at what your potential girlfriend has done to my face!" Dementor whined. "And for this, I will NEVER FORGIVE YOU!"

The professor slapped on a plastic object onto the blond's face. With his hands tied, there was no way he could pull it off himself.

"That is my Mask," Dementor stated triumphantly. "Since I know that Kim Possible is already here, she will have to figure out how to take it off. And if she can't, the mask will EXPLODE, SENDING MILLIONS UPON MILLIONS OF SIDEKICK PIECES INTO THE UPPER STRATUSPHERE!"

Drakken & Shego cringed, though it probably had something to do with the short professor's voice. On the other hand, Stoppable was shocked. He had really hoped that Dementor was right about Kim snooping around.

How despicable of a set up. How diabolical a plan. How sinister a plot. _How does Jesse McCartney sleep at night, knowing that "Get Your Shine On" is the worst cross of R&B, Pop, and Rap since, like, ever? _

"How do you know that Kim is here?" Ron asked, his panic level rising.

The prof began to open his mouth, but as he did, the lights in the warehouse went dark. After a couple of grunts and groans, the lights turned back on. Ron rubbed his eyes from the sudden loss and gain of light, and opened them back up to see who it was.

Kim!

"Kim Possible!" Dr. Drakken said. "Your only love is here... Run along! Be free! Begin your lives... as one!"

He was stuffed by Dementor, who clamped his hand over the strange-acting doctor's mouth.

"What he meant to say was... SHEGO, ATTACK!"

"Hey, Shorty!" The villainess shouted derisively. "I don't take orders from you," she said defiantly.

When the raven-haired woman saw that her rival was charging at her, she quickly changed her tune and took up a defensive stance. The redhead stopped, only to give her a warning.

"Get out of my way," The teen heroine said through gritted teeth.

"I'm afraid I can't let you do that, Princess," The villainess replied.

There it was. The spectators have seen it before and were seeing it again. The rivalry. The eternal battle. Good versus Evil. Righteous versus Wicked. The strong, explosive Shego versus the intelligent, resourceful Kim. The sparks that would fly. The back-talking. The blows that were traded. It was quintessential. It was a classic. It was...

...Over already.

"Wow, Nineteen seconds," Dementor marveled as Drakken's henchmen literally peeled the raven-haired woman's motionless carcass off of the colder than cold ground.

"Where's Ron?" Kim asked calmly,but still intensely.

Her question was answered by two more henchmen coming at her. With relative ease, the rehead managed to sidestep the two bulky marauding men. With a quick trip, the first henchman went down like a rock. The second got much closer, enclosing the young womn in a bear hug. Unfortunately for him, her legs were still free. So with a well-placed heel to his... ball bearings, the second henchman could say goodbye to winning this battle... and the concept of having children for that matter.

"I'm not going to ask you again," She said to both Dementor and Drakken. The blue-skinned doctor was terrified. As for the professor... Well, he was defiant.

You see, he was running slightly less faster than Drakken to the exit.

"You want your sidekick? Then YOU CAN HAVE HIM!" He yelled. With a press of a button, the sidekick came stumbling out of his enclosure area.

'I'm free... Booyah!'

"Ron!" The redhead yelled as the blond came into her view. She almost skipped toward, when they met, Kim grabbed hold of the blond and pulled him into a tight oxygen-escaping embrace. Ron was definitely loving the fact that Kim wasn't mad at him anymore. But his ribs were going to snap in like, three seconds... and there was that mask...

"K-Kim," He stammered. "You gotta get this thing on my face."

Kim obliged by trying to pull the clear object off of his face, but to no avail. Right after that attempt, a faint beeping sound began to eminate from the mask.

"Uh, what's that?" Kim asked nervously.

"It's the mask!" Ron answered. "It's gonna explode if we don't find a way to get it off!"

The beeping sound continued as a timer showing exactly ninety seconds began to tick away. Kim tried anything so long at it didn't hurt her best friend. More pulling, more grabbing, no result. After forty-five seconds passed, Ron came up with an idea.

"Kim--I got an idea. Try to hit the mask!"

"No, Ron. That'll hurt you."

"K.P., it's a lot better than exploding into tiny pieces. You gotta do it!"

Kim was beginning to panic - Very much so, in fact.

"But what if it doesn't work? What if I don't hit it hard enough?"

"Kim, I know you'll hit it hard enough," He said calmly.

"How do you know?" _Thirty seconds._

"Because I understand now, Kim. You've been avoiding me because you were ticked off at me because I didn't get the point."

Kim was speechless. She really was. Did Drakken and Shego give this boy some hints or something?

Ron worked his way out of the ropes on his hands.

"A-And now that I know how you feel, Kim. I think it would be best, for the both of us..." He took her hands, her eyes sparkling into his, and likewise.

"...If we stayed friends."

WHACK!

That, indeed was the sound of Kim's fist connecting with the blond's face. The sidekick went down like Disney stock. But more importantly, the clear mask/explosive cracked in two, which meant it posed no danger to Ron. The timer stopped at an uncharacteristic 0:04, everyone was safe.

Except for Ron, Kim thought, dragging away his unconscious body. He was still going to be in big trouble.

Well, once he woke up anyway.

* * *

The End... 

Yep, the end...

The end of the fic.

Honest truth...

Disappointed?

So am I...

Yep, this is the End, beautiful friends...

Well, not really.

* * *

_  
And now... S-Chrome presents the Super Mega Happy Angsty Happy Ending Version! Brought to you by Disney. Because, well... you know... They looove happy, sappy, cliched endings. _

* * *

Ron woke up in... Where the heck was he? 

OK, he was in his house. It was nighttime. Geez... He was out _that_ long? And... his face hurt. Man, that girl had a nasty right hook. Speaking of that girl, she was right there.

"Good, you're awake," He heard his best friend say without enthusiasm. At a moment's notice, the redhead raised from the chair next to the couch where Ron was... Peacefully sleeping, and went out the door of his house.

Ron was confused... as usual. Why was she leaving? Where was she going? What was the deal? She looked pretty upset. He wracked his brain looking for answers, but none came to him. But as the door slammed, he remembered.

_Just friends? What was he thinking?_

Oops.

"Kim, Wait!" He yelled, running out the door.

Total rejection.

Kim had never quite felt this feeling before. Heck, it didn't feel a third as bad with when she and Josh broke up. But this was Ron. Her best friend of over a decade. Her admittedly cute sidekick. Her six month crush. Her... _Ronnie-Ron_

All of a sudden, the redhead had wished that the blond had stayed oblivious to her feelings. Maybe she should have ignored the butterflies. Maybe she shouldn't have dropped all those hints for him. _Maybe... Just, maybe Raven was a... tad overweight. _

Maybe she didn't know that Ron was practically doing three months worth of exercise running after her.

The blond had run three blocks searching when Rufus pointed her out. She was down the block. Stoppable ignored the fact that he was in brutally cold weather wearing a short-sleeved T-Shirt, he still ran, ran...

_Raaaaan for loooooove! _

He was still half a block behind her when his thoughts about the today's shenanigans came back to him. Even though Doctor D sounded like a total maniac, what he as saying was true. Kim was the only girl that he knew of that could actually stand his oh-so obvious flaws... and she really may have liked him. It was almost as if...

_"Ron Stoppable, you're the best." _

"Kim and Ron. Sounds good to me.'

_"Come on, Ron. You know I can't stay mad at you."_

Oh my goodness gracious!

It wasn't just a crush.

It was bigger than that.

"Kiiiiim, Wait!" He whined as he began to run toward her.

This made the attractive redhead stop. She looked miserable, the dried streaks upon her face had suggested that she'd been crying. She waited for the blond to run up to her. He panted for a couple seconds. Four blocks straight... Then began to speak.

"What do you want, Ron?" Kim asked plaintively.

"Kim.. I'm totally sorry about what I said. It was an honest mistake. I don't know why I said it..."

Another apology? Geez...Before they could go any further, she had to know the truth.

"Ron... Just told me. Before you got... captured, did you really know how I felt about you?"

"Uh... Well... Yes, and No. I guess the thing was that I knew, but didn't want to believe it."

"Why?" Asked Kim.

"I didn't want to believe that a pretty girl that also happened to be my best friend liked me that way."

"Why not?"

"Uh, Well Kim... Ever since you became the girl who could do anything, I never thought I was good enough to be your best friend, and after what I said this afternoon, well... uh, now I know," He said sadly. His shoulders slumping in defeat. :...You know what, Kim? I'll just go now... I know you don't want to hear any more of this."

Just like that, Ron turned away. What were the chances of Kim forgiving him again? He had enough chances, or so he thought. She would find someone better than him one of these days.

"Hey, Rufus," He asked forlornly. "You think Kim will ever forgive me?"

Before he could even get the entire question out, he was almost tackled from behind. Who the heck attacked him? Was it the bad guys again coming to make good on their threat? Why was his or her arms still around him? All he had to do was turn around to see who it was.

Kim?

_Seriously?_

He was going to speak, but the redhead placed a finger to his lips.

"You think I'm going to give up on you _that _easily?" She asked smirking.

"Uh... Well..."

"Look, Ron. I'm just going to go ahead and tell you. I _like _you... I like you a lot. And... for the last six months, I've been trying to get close to you."

"But, we're already close, right?"

"Well, Yeah. But I mean close in a different way..."

For once in a long time, Ron actually got it.

"Oh!" He said. Now was his chance.

"And uh, what I said this afternoon, I didn't really mean it."

"You didn't? Then why did you say it?"

Ron replied with a grin on his face.

"You wouldn't hit me that hard if I didn't say it."

Kim grinned right back.

"So that means..."

"You bet, K.P.," He finished. "So, would you do me the incredible honor of..."

He paused.

"...Being my girlfriend?"

"Si. I mean, Oui. No... No. I mean, Yes, Yes, Yes!" She exclaimed, squeezing the blond tightly. After they broke the embrace, the redhead gazed longingly into the blond's eyes.

"Ron, aren't you forgetting something?"

"Huh? Ohhh! Yeah, I'm sorry about your CD. I didn't know the song was about me."

"That's not it, Ron."

"Uh... Sorry I made you wait for six months?"

"No that's still not it, Ron. Besides, you're worth it."

"What am I forgetting, then?"

"It involves the lips," She said, grinning mischievously.

"Ohhh... Singing! Sorry about ragging on Christy. You two sound a lot alike. Which may be good or bad..."

Kim sighed, how clear did she have to make this?

"Ron... Less yakking, more lip smacking."

"...Then again, maybe you can project your voice to sound _less _like her. Either way I think--"

That did it.

Pulling the _still _oblivious young man inches close to her, Kim made her point short, sweet, and to the point... For once.

"Kiss me, Ron. **Now!**"

"Ohhhh... Well, you don't have to tell me twice," Ron replied with a grin.

The teen heroine rolled her eyes before closing the distance between herself and her crush... No, boyfriend. The blond's eyes rolled back in his head in obvious pleasure. Kim was seeing stars, fireworks and things of that nature... Their first official kiss as a couple, and it felt like heaven mixed with nachos... She closed her eyes and let cleared her thoughts. Who knows what was next for the young couple. All that she knew now is that now, finally, they were both on the same page.

Uh... Right?

* * *

The green-clad henchwoman had finally woke up -- and almost yelled on contact. 

Why the heck was Drakken right next to her?

And why did he look so concerned?

"Shego, I'm so glad that you are awake," He said.

"So am I," She replied sarcastically. "What's up with the bedside vigil?"

"Well, Shego. I felt really guilty about what happened earlier."

"Uh, Doctor D. I'm the hench-girl, that's what I'm supposed to do."

"Well, I still feel guilty about it. Hopefully, you can forgive me with an all-expenses-paid, two week vacation starting now?"

Seriously?

Wow. Whatever it was that had Drakken feeling bad about her she needed to have more of.

"Gosh. Thanks, Doctor D," She said appreciatively. "And... What's gotten into you?"

"Shego, I... I can't say how I feel right now. But...," He paused, pulling an object out from his pocket. "...This will explain it more clearly."

He gave her CD Player with an unmarked compact disc inside.

"Go on. Take a listen," He said encouragingly.

Pressing the play button, the villainess began to hear the song. It was familiar to her in some way, but then the kicker came. Her eyes shot open a moment as she took a glance at the doctor. As she looked, the song continued...

**_Could it be, you and I, never imagined  
Could it be, suddenly, I'm falling for you?_**

_'Oh no,' Shego thought frantically. _

**Could it be that you were right here beside me  
And I never knew?  
Could it be that it's true that it's you?**

"Oh, **hell **no..."

* * *

The Real End 

Closing Statements: There you are ladies and gentlemen, Situation Oblivious. Would you believe that in the beginning this was supposed to be just a one-shot with about 2500 words? Good, me neither.

I originally did not have the ending like this. But the Greek God of Fluff and Angst, Fluffagis, commanded me to do so. And when the Fluff God calls, you must accept the charges.

And before I go, Ms. Romano is pretty bad at singing, but nothing against her. But McCartney... Oh, I'd like to SMACK that kid, and again, and...

Ahem...

Uh... Review. Comment. And... You had BETTER have had as much fun reading it as I did writing it. Or ELSE!

...and whatnot.

S-Chrome


End file.
